BullshitNow

Will You Change Humanity?
Tue Sep 25

Top 5 Reasons I Hate Missouri (Misery)

I’ve lived in Moberly for 18 years and Columbia for about 7, and am currently in gorgeous southern California.  It’s been a long journey for me, but I never could warm up to that state.

5.  The weather is completely schizo.  One minute it will be 85 degrees and then it will be 40 & raining 20 minutes later.  The last six months I lived there, I counted about 4 days where it was beautiful (70-78 degrees, partly breezy & cloudy).  Because Missouri is where it is, you don’t get much chance to do winter sports & such like the happy north.  

4.  Too many bible beating rednecks/relatives in one place for a bible burning agnostic like me.   Try going into a bar wearing anything remotely flambuoyant and you will get stared down by all the people who think you’re gay.

3.  Their biggest university, my alma matter, is way too fraternity/sorority centric for my liking.  Ninety-five percent of all their bars are catered toward this crowd.  For shame.

2.  Missouri has the lowest paid teachers in the entire United States.  Super lame.  They also have some of the worst roads & highways in the USA.

1.  Their biggest cities, Kansas City, Saint Louis, Springfield & Jefferson City are all about as fun as wiping your ass.  If you take sports out of Saint Louis, you end up getting an ultra catholic, ultra boring shithole with rude people and hoosiers.

 If anyone else has any thoughts about Missouri, please feel free to rant or destroy my arguments.  This is my first official post for digg.  Thanks!